New Year's Resolutions: The Soon-to-Be Forgotten Promise

January 06, 2019 4 min read

New Year's Resolutions: The Soon-to-Be Forgotten Promise

Special thanks to our guest blogger, Ryan Lang (@ryanlangradio), for contributing this post!

As I sit at my computer, having just devoured a double quarter pounder, I can't help but think two things: first, that the sandwich was better with the crappier, less-fresh meat, and second, that I should probably make my New Year's Resolutions list. 

Of course I'd be lying if I claimed this annual undertaking was one that I adhered to with ritualistic tenacity and undying commitment. BUT, I oft justify my noncompliance to my "New Year, New Me" with the pretext of, hey, at least I made the list, right? So without further ado, I give you MY 2019 New Year's Resolutions... 

1. Workout, Lose Weight, Feel Great: Seems only natural this be the first atop this list, as I quench my post-lunch heartburn with a large Coca-Cola. While I'm actually generally OK with where I'm at health wise, I know there is room for improvement... And by "room" I mean a LOT of room. I've recently gotten back into running, which I wouldn't recommend to anyone, and I've been hitting the gym more, so I feel like I'm off to a good start. I mean, we're talking about a guy who only went to the gym he signed up for thrice in 2018: once for the free training session that came with membership and took me six months to recover from physically; the second time, I pulled into the parking lot with the full intention of walking in, parked, smoked a cigarette, and then pulled out (I've since quit smoking, so screw your judgements!); and the third time to cancel the aforementioned membership. 

2. Read More: I've always fancied myself a reader, but at 36-years-old I've come to the determination that OWNING books doesn't make you a reader, it just makes you look like one. SO, my goal for this New Year is to read all... ok, some of those books that have been collecting dust on my shelves. I've got a good start on two already, and I've made a list of the ones I plan to concur, so I've got all that going for me. But I'd like to broaden the scope of this Resolution to the "beyond books" category. I'm thinking it would be nice to read more everything. Read more labels at the store, which can have health benefits. Read more Facebook statuses, which could wind up ruining my day or spur an unwanted political argument, or finally get me to unfriend Uncle Lou who has always been worthless (names have been changed to protect Uncle Lou... Wait... DAMN!). The newspaper! That's still a thing in 2019... for now. More magazines at the grocery store, so I don't actually have to buy them... And so on and so forth. Knowledge is power in 2019! 

3. Never Drink Again: Look, I'm not judging anyone who likes to have the occasional adult beverage, or even anyone who occasionally likes to end up in the police blotter for the things they did while drinking, I have just come to the realization that alcohol has never in my 36 years done a single good thing for me. Unless we're talking about the 2007 French Toast Open... But that's a whole different blog. I'm getting older now. I'm getting wiser... OK, I'm getting older, and I don't have time for hangovers, and I certainly don't want to be out til 2 a.m., EVER, spending money I don't have. And guess what: that's typically how it ends up. So adios, Uncle Jameson! It's been real, bro. 

4. See More Movies: This Resolution by no means falls under the "personal growth" category, but hot damn, there are a TON of kickass movies coming out in 2019, including the new Avengers, "It: Chapter 2," and another "Leprechaun" installment, which is bound to be hot garbage, but I'll no doubt really enjoy it. Aside from the major releases I've mentioned, Netfilx is killin' the movie game and there are bound to be more brilliant efforts from everyone's favorite streaming service, so count me in. Sure, seeing more movie also translates into being less social, but guess what, I'm old now, and I pretty much know all the people I want to know, so I'll catch you at the movies where we won't have the chance to catch up. 

5. See More Live Music: This has been on my Resolution list the past few years, and likely the only one I've actually seen through. A recent "study" shows that going to concerts and seeing live music does more for your health than yoga (I'm paraphrasing, as I'm sure there was actually much more to the study). So guess what, namaste right here until the end of the encore and rage on with my fellow music lovers. To me, there is nothing more cathartic than seeing your favorite band live. For me, that band is Phish, and I've come to terms that those dudes aren't likely going to be touring for much longer, as they're old AF (as the kids say), so I'd better check them out as often as I can while I STILL can. Oh, and there's going to be a 50th anniversary Woodstock concert... IN (or around) BETHEL, NY! Dude... We should TOTALLY go! 

6. Avoid The BS: As an active member of Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, it's more often than not hard to avoid people's BS. But my last piece of advice to both myself and to you, is utilize the greatest feature in social media: the Unfollow feature. It's really the simplest way to filter the negativity and drama and everything else that's making you go grey, or wrinkle, or go bald (bald is beautiful, BTW), or whatever else. We're only here for a short time, good people, so don't let other people's drama slow down your llama... Abraham Lincoln once said that. 

Happy New Year, everyone! 

Tera Chmura
Tera Chmura

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